Buy A ‘Marshall Mathers LP’ Cassette, Eminem Gives You A Brick

(Illustration by Max Higgins)

If you’ve ever thought that the only thing early-2000’s hip hop was missing was sturdy building materials, then Eminem has finally got you covered!

The highest selling artist of the decade 2000 – 2009 has launched a new range on his online shop that includes the option for 700 lucky listeners, or bar-spitting bricklayers, to purchase a piece of his childhood home. For only US $313 you too can own a piece of the house featured on the cover of  Eminem’s album cover, along with a shiny black display case so when you have house guests they can inspect the lump of clay on your mantle.

But wait, there’s more! Not only will you receive the brick, but you get the ‘Marshall Mathers LP’ on the newest music format, glorious cassette, to listen to in your Olympic Edition Holden Commodore.

Proceeds from the products now available in Eminem’s online store are going towards rebuilding the city of Detroit, which has been having some massive financial problems in recent years. Personally, we thought a rebuilding effort would be hampered by the loss of bricks, but we’re writers, not builders. Other items in Shady’s online store include a far more postage-friendly dog tag for US $28 and T-shirt for US $35.

For avid Eminem fans, please note that these prices don’t include import taxes, which may be a minefield considering Australia’s notoriety with customs.