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Calvin Harris Makes Fatal Mistake, Asks Public For New Twitter Profile Pic


Scottish national mascot and co-king (along with Andy Murray) Calvin Harris is on a search. Screw the Holy Grail, the missing link, or Hillary’s emails, Harris is searching for something more real and more important: a new profile picture on Twitter.

Unfortunately for the producer, he tw@@ted about it, getting the public to help him in his search. If we’ve learnt anything from 2016, it’s that you can never trust the public to vote on anything #Brexit #Trump.

There were some brilliant responses, with highlights like Dillon Francis’ suggestion that Harris showcase a hefty plastic phallus, a number of fan art submissions, and an unsurprising number of pics with heartbreaker Taylor Swift.

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We’ve also added some of our personal take on it, so if Calvy picks up on our article, you’re welcome, mate.


Side note: we’re not the world’s biggest conspiracy theorists here, but are we’re 100 per cent sure Calvin Harris wasn’t killed by the CIA and replaced by a more malleable clone?


Check out Harris’ last good contribution (This Is What You Came Here For notwithstanding) below!

Written by Max Higgins